February 7, 2012

There are a lot of days of the year men look forward to…

Opening day of baseball, the first regular season NFL game, the Daytona kick off to the NASCAR season, opening day of deer season etc; but Valentine’s Day usually isn’t one of them. Why is that?

Oh, it’s a “nationally promoted marketing event that is over emphasized by women” you say.

You say, “It’s unfair that one particular day I am expected to buy candy, get a card and do unnatural stuff in order to meet a deadline which is neither romantic nor a true reflection of my feelings for my girl.” You say, “When I need to tell her I love her, I’ll do it my way and in my time, I don’t need a marketing machine to force me into it”.


When was the last time you told her she was special and proved it with an appropriate gift?

Maybe were looking at it all wrong – we don’t see it the way our women do.

Wait, give me a second – let me complete my thought. Maybe it’s all about expectations for her, not a false duty for us. Maybe it isn’t an obligatory national holiday as much as it is a chance to express the truth.

The truth is there is a question that is being asked and needs to be answered…“is she special”?

I think Valentines is all about expectations, not romance, per se. The expectation is raised by this national awareness ritual and we have a chance to meet the moment – is she special, is she the one, is she the true highlight today, representing every day of your life?

In fact, let me cut through the machismo criticism – when was the last time you brought home flowers, gave her a kiss on the cheek and said simply; “I was thinking about you today”? When was the last time you went shopping for a card that wasn’t for your anniversary, her birthday or an illness – just an “I was thinking about you today”, card? What about candy, a quiet dinner without the kids, or your lap top? When was the last time you did that just because you were thinking about her and how thankful you are that she is in your life, she has made it better, she in fact, has made you better? When was the last time you celebrated the fact of her presence in your life with a simple reminder from your heart?

Hey, I don’t like getting pushed into anything either. And I don’t like to spend money as a token to make others happy. So relax. You don’t have to spend a lot on dinner, flowers or whatever this Valentine’s day. But you do have to meet the expectation that your special lady has.

She wants to know if you think she is special.

Jesus said, once… “Greater love has no man than this, but to give up himself for the sake of his friend”. Come on guys, your woman is more than a friend! Give up the apathetic attitude and give her your undivided attention this year.

– Article contributed by Jim Coté, President of the Master’s Men ministry.